Sources: - Mets Expand Search for Field Manager

Sources have told me that Sandy Alderson, the new General Manager for the New York Mets has decided to extend his search for the manager, who will eventually replace Jerry Manuel.


Alderson has told insiders that he doesn’t want to leave any stone unturned in his quest to find the person with right combination of chemistry, baseball intelligence, and knowledge of both the history of the game as well as recent additions to the game, like sabremetrics.


Confidential sources say the following individuals have been added to the search list:

-Aung San Suu Kyi, recently released pro-democracy leader of Myanmar, who has been in house arrest since the last time the Mets won a World Series. Alderson feels she can relate to the recent past of the team by reflecting upon her isolation, which would be, in his words, “similar to watching Alay Solar pitch that Saturday game on network television a few years ago.”

- Andrew Shirvell, the Michigan’s ex-Assistant District Attorney recently featured on Anderson Cooper 360 for harassing Chris Armstrong, a gay student at the University of Michigan. “We need to make sure we reach out to all aspects of diversity”, said Alderson, “even if some seem a further reach than others.”

-Karl Ehrhardt, the original “Sign Man” from the old “You Gotta Believe” days of Shea Stadium. Officials of the Mets were having difficulty confirming if he is still alive, and we’re finally informed late yesterday that Karl had died in 2008. “We thought something was wrong,” said Alderson. “There’s no sign of him.”

The entire city of El Centro, California, who, at 27.0%, is the city with the highest unemployment rate in the country. Alderson was philosophical: “There has to be someone there that has managed a baseball team.”


Dkresh1, the owner of the Mets Blog “Be Gone With Wilpon”. DK, if given the job, promises that he will change the name of his blog to “Ricco Eats the Big One”, or something like that.


The search will continue through the Thanksgiving holidays.