4/22/21

Tom Brennan - METS TELEPORTED BACK TO DEAD BALL ERA



The dreary black and white dead ball era.


Every season, some players come out of the gate like a ball of fire, while others come out like frozen sewer sludge.

This season is Frozen Sludge City for the Mets.  

Essentially all of them.  The Dead Ball era has returned for the Mets.

Game 2 of the season?  Scored 8 runs. Felt real good.  

The other 18 games? 49 runs.  About 2.5 runs per.  DEAD BALL.

Last in runs BY SEVENTEEN, at just 57.DEAD BALL.

Last in HRs by 5, at 15.  Pete has 5, the entire rest of the team, heading into May after 1 more game, has 10.  No one else has more than 2 HRs.  DEAD BALL..

After a miserable 2020 hitting with RISP in 2020, the Mets are hitting under .200 with RISP as a team in 2021.  DEAD BALL.

Last in doubles with 22.  DEAD BALL.

Lindor (he of the enormous new contract), Conforto (he who wants but does not deserve one), Smith (who hit over .300 last year) and McNeil (who hit over .300 last year) are a combined 52 for 251 (.209) with a mere 6 HRs and 19 RBIs.  DEAD BALL.

The expensive James McCann?  4 RBIs in 16 games.  DEAD BALL.

The reserves?  Pillar, Nido, and Almora are a combined 5 for 42 (around .120), WITH 0 HRs, 0 RBIs.  DEAD BALL.

Only one Met with as many as 12 RBIs, and only 3 more who have between 6 and 8 RBIs.  DEAD BALL.

Team slugging %?  Mets are dead last.  DEAD BALL..

Jake deGrom has 6 hits.  All other Mets pitchers?  No hits.  DEAD BALL.

Level of interest in watching this sorry excuse for a Mets hitting team? 

DEAD.  I'll have a BALL watching Netflix instead.  Or watching paint dry, which is also more fun.  I almost instead watched the one thing I couldn't bring myself to watch, unless the alternative was root canal: Joe Biden.

Remember one thing as you ponder this putrid bunch.  

They don't have to face the 4th best team in MLB ERA at 3.05.  You want to know why?  Because that 4th best-in-ERA team is the Mets.

Jake against these Mets sissy hitters?  

A no hitter, with 20 Ks and perhaps a Brandon Nimmo walk would probably be the outcome.

I have to ask - may I ask?  Is there a curse on this team?  

Serious respondents only.

P.S. 

People sometimes go on hunger strikes to try to force and accelerate needed change. The impotent Mets lost 2-1 and 1-0 the last two nights. 

I pointed out the barn to them...see?  It’s right there, fellas, that big, red one - see it?  Alas, they could neither see nor hit the big barn, even though it has a broad side.  

So my “hunger strike” may be to stop writing about these putzes until they start hitting like hitters who are not putzes. Maybe I’ll write about teams that CAN hit instead.

Heck, Cincinnati has 35 HRs and 128 runs, they sure look like fun.  

Do they need blog writers?

I am not joking. I’m serious. 

Nothing worse than writing about a team that you expect to score like the 1986 Mets, only to find out you are dyslexic and they really hit every bit as bad as the anemic 1968 Mets. 

"Aww, it's just a team slump."  I ain't buying that.  

Wimps. Losers.

No more excuses.   Also, no more excuses.

Or send them all to AAA.

Hit the darned ball or I put down the darned pen. 

(Could that be their plan all along? Are they on a DEAD BALL hitting strike to get me to stop writing?)

 

LOL...SMH.

BORING, BORING, BORING.

Someone will say they are just one game below .500.

I will say one thing: BORING.

And one more thing: OVERRATED.



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