12/14/10

Phillies Sign BabeRuth, Honus Wagner, Walter Johnson, Ty Cobb & Christy Mathewson!!!

By David Rubin

That's right- the Philadelphia Phillies have just announced the signings of Babe Ruth, Walter Johnson, Honus Wagner, Christy Mathewson & Ty Cobb. In order to make room on their roster, according to GM Ruben Amaro, the team will be looking to move Joe Blanton, Raul Ibanez, Jimmy Rollins, Shane Victorino and Ryan Madson. Rumor is the Yankees will be happy to take whatever players the Phillies no longer want, as they're getting used to spending money on other people's cast-offs.

At press time, we could NOT confirm the rumors that Amaro had also inquired after Sandy Koufax, Bob Gibson, Juan Marichal and Whitey Ford - but a rival GM called the rumors "unfounded." "Besides - he continued - I'm sure Amaro will wait until the 2011 Winter Meetings to acquire THOSE guys!"

There's also no truth to the rumor that Amaro is responsible for that rash of robberies in the Gates, Buffet & Trump households...

More on these stories as they break...


1 comment:

Mack Ade said...

this is obsurd

Cobb has a two-year no cut commitment with PETA....